mini ms.busybody

Feeling extra emotional this couple of days. My baby is growing up so fast. She has so many antics on her own and sometimes I feel she's like a mini adult. She listens when I talk to her like she understands me. She puts on a serious face when I scold her. She has to join in the adults conversation and she started voicing out her opinions in her high pitch squeals.

Just last night, she refuses to sleep after her bedtime feeding. So we spend some time playing on the bed. She has this really cute way of putting her hands on my cheeks like she wants to comfort me and staring into my eyes. But that happens only for a split second before her fingers poke my nose. Haha... But I do enjoy letting her hands explore my face just cause she had cute chubby hands. She's such a curious little thing and have to touch, grab, kick everything she comes in contact with. She has strong legs, this little one.

She started patting me whenever she needs something. Like when I carry her, she's pat my back to let me know if she have pooped or that she is hungry or tired. 

I will never get tired of the way she looks at me. Like when I'm feeding her. She stops and look up at me. And when I carry her in the carrier while doing housework. And when she just wakes up from napping on me. She's just stare at me with her big eyes and gives a smile like I'm the most important person in the world. Her smiles still makes me all gooey and soft inside. Her shrill chuckles and laughter still makes my day. When she lays her little head on my chest/ shoulder, my life feels complete. 

So it's OK that she wants to nap on me every time every day, or that she prefers to sleep with me in bed every night. Or she wants to nurse longer than usual. Or if she wants me to carry her and bounce her up and down for ages. Because I know very soon, she will not need me as much anymore. I am so not looking forward to that day. So till then, she will be my round mini ms busybody. 

One of those days

It's high time I start blogging again. Made so many promises yet procrastination got in the way. I am back from a 3 week roadtrip with a 5 month old baby in tow. What better time than now?

Anyway, things have been a little topsy turvy lately as we try to settle back home and into a routine. Hannah seems to be extra fussy and clingy. Feeding is all over the place and starting solid food seem to be going down the drain. 

For example, this morning she work up crying and refuse to be pacify. She usually wakes up happy and on days when she wakez up unhappy, a little coaching gets her all happy and smiley again. Today, nothing worked. By 11am, I am so tired. We have gone through all her toys and play stations, read half her books and sang all her songs, took her morning nap abeit it was a short one, nursed a couple of times, tried feeding her (tried is the key word), pooped thrice and walked around the house a couple of times. On top of that, I had to prepare lunch and do the laundry. 

The rest of the day was slightly better as her mood improved a bit. She was still fussy and clingy but playing merry-go-round with her toys helped in getting some work done. But you know, it's just one of those days. 

It's almost midnight now and I finally got her to sleep, in her own crib. It's been a long day. But just now, as I was rocking her to sleep, she put her head on my chest and I could feel her tiny body settling and relaxing. And that made the entire day perfect.

Parenthood is not a bed of roses. There are up times and down times and there are times when you just wondered if there was light at the end of the tunnel. but when that tiny head rest on your chest, and both your heart beats together, it made all the worries and stress just melts away. And there are nothing better in the world than just being  her mama, right here, right now. 

At least it is for me.. I love you, baby girl!